Thursday, March 31, 2011

50 Years Ago VS Today Better?

I ran across this yesterday in a book I am reading.  I thought it was worth sharing with you all.

This was taken out of a 1950's public high school home economics textbook.

How To Be a Good Wife Today

-Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal on time.  This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs.  Most men are hungry when they come home, and the prospect of a good meal is part of the warm welcome needed.

-Prepare Yourself.  Take 15 minutes to rest so that you'll be refreshed when he arrives.  Touch up your makeup, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking.  He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.  Be a little gay and a little more interesting.  His boring day  may need a lift.

-Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up schoolbooks, toys, and papers.  Then, run a dust cloth over the tables.  Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift too!

-Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small).  Comb their hair, and if necessary, change their cloths.  They are little treasures, and he would like to see them playing the part.

-Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, dishwasher, or vacuum.  Try to encourage the children to be quiet.  Be happy to see him.  Greet him with a warm smile.

Some Don'ts

-Don't greet him with problems or complaints.

-Don't complain if he is late for dinner.  Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day.  Make him comfortable.  Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom.  Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.  Arrange his pillow, and offer to take off his shoes.  Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice.  Allow him to relax and unwind.

-Listen to him. You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.

-Make the evening his. Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment.  Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and relax.

"The goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order, where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit."

You know, I cannot help but wonder what our world would be like today if this was still taught.  Has so called "Woman's Liberation" really helped us?  Or has it made everything worse?  This may offend a lot of you, but I can't help but wonder if we wives (myself included) did more of the things on this list and less of what WE want to do, if we might have a happier and more fulfilling marriage.
Just a little something to think about.  What do you think?
UPDATE:  I tried some of this last night, just to see if it made a difference.  When my hubby pulled into the driveway I turned the Ipod off, and the computer as well (I was writing this post when he got home!).  Little Monkey and I met him at the door with smiles and hugs.  It was late, he had gone to help a friend move the last of their stuff into storage, so it was 9 p.m.  I asked if he minded if we ate after LM went to bed, he was okay with that.  We sat in the living room and he told me about his day while he played with LM, then we talked about my day.  After LM went to bed we sat down to dinner and talked some more.  This has not been the case the last couple of weeks.  We finish dinner and go our separate ways, him upstairs to work on the computer, me to clean the kitchen, and finish any cleaning I didn't get done that day.  It was a good improvement.  Try it, see if you don't notice a difference!  


  1. Melissa, I applaud your courage to post this. We all need reminders and this was a great one. I heard a husband say a long time ago, "I come home every night, some men don't. You can count the minutes from when I get off work to when I will be home." Oh, to make a home that a husband longs for. Keep up the good work, go girl!

  2. I believe you are onto something!

  3. I totally agree with those ideas and try my best to implement them - they do make a huge difference.

  4. Tis True, Tis True! I know the times that I do this our evening is much more peaceful and fulfilling. I love it when my hubby tells me he can't wait to come home to me and the kids. I hope to keep him feeling that way. I remember your mom always wanting the living room picked up before your dad got home. Good example. Thanks for posting. It's always good to be reminded of such things because I don't always remember. Sometimes, life gets in the way. Since I know it works, I just need to be more consistent. Thanks again for the reminder.

  5. Bottom line: it is common courtesy we would show anyone coming to our home. Why is it so wrong to extend the same courtesy to the one we should love most of all???

    Just sayin'......

  6. After reading this on a homeschooling forum a year or so ago I also did the same and I cannot tell you the difference in our marriage...of course it is not perfect but I think in any relationship you should be asking what can I do for them, not what can they do for me. great post.

  7. What a great idea- I will have to try this when hubby goes back to work- he's on holidays until after Easter!